We are forever growing...One step at a time, one discovery at a time. Just when I think I have it all figured out WHAM something new pops up and I am rendered useless... wellll....l not really more like thrown off balance-kinda like a spinning top that falls over.
I love the question when people ask you w"What do you want" ahhhh is this s trick question.....Between the carpooling, sports schedule dinners, laundry , bills, grocery store runs I don't think I have stopped in a long time to figure out what do I want, and my typical flighty answer of "Peace on Earth" isn't really cutting it.
So lets break it down into a simpler question..."What makes you happy?" Again is this a trick question....I am happy when i get all the above mentioned stuff done in the time frame I am suppose to, so my friend looked at me (I think she was about to slap me) WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY????? ok deep breath here goes.... hikes in the woods, a really good cup of coffee, being in or near the water, being with good friends, helping people....most of all my KIDS! i think I almost ran out of oxygen...
I think for many years I waited and waited for that AH HA! moment...you know the moment when you everything would be clear...all my questions would be answered, I would know exactly what I was suppose to know and how to do it. I was so busy focusing on waiting for that moment, all the signs, messages, and thing put in my way were ignored or not noticed. It was only when I stopped to "smell the flowers" for a moment that I became aware of all the things that were being placed in my path. Each one of those moments lead me to where I am today, so I do not look at my past with dread or regret, if I had not experienced everyone of those things, I would not see things the way I do now.
NOW , mindfulness, being in the moment finding joy in all I do, from watching a soccer game and cheering my children on, to negotiating a business deal, to volunteering at a school function, and my most recent awareness...I LOVE TO LEARN i love school, I have a thirst for knowledge and I LOVE HELPING PEOPLE, to give back to people what has so freely been given to me...Support, guidance, friendship, a shoulder to cry on, a hand to hold, to a hug filled with love
THAT IS HAPPINESS for me....What is happiness for you? Are you still waiting for that Ah Ha moment, if so stop, breathe deep for a minute...deep breaths fill your belly and exhale open your eyes, what do you see??